Boss Jokes | Hate My Job

Share Your Bossism

Number: 79 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

May 1st 2009
Boss:Im gonna need you to put in 90+ hours a week thru Christmas
Me:We both know I'm not gonna do that
Boss:If you dont,the project will fall apart, We both know that,Besides...No one tells me No
Me:Well,My answer is NO
Boss: Well my answer is your fired

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Number: 78 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

Another pearl of wisdom from on high; this came up when scheduling system maintenance.
Boss: We have to keep in mind when scheduling that when it is 8am here (NYC) it is 8am in Asia Pacific.
Employee: Not unless there are two suns!
Again; how fast can boss loose control in meetin

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Number: 77 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

Employee: As I see it there are multiple problems.
Boss: What do you mean multiple problems?
Employee: um...more than one...
Cases like this are how the "boss" quickly looses control in a meeting.

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Number: 76 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

my boss is really not such a bad guy in some ways, but he is some what cheap(over works me and under pays me) I understand bussiness is very bad these days so it`s hard to pay some one a salary to live on. I just gave 2 weeks notice for a better paying, better beneifits less hours and shorter comute

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Number: 75 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

My boss is a raving idiot with no backbone. He doesn't have a clue what he's doing at work, spends most of his time screwing off and pushes his work off onto everyone else so he can talk to his gf on the phone. I wish I could be get paid so much to do so little.

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Number: 74 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

I use to sell cars. A customer had left their keys in the sales office while on a test drive in a new car. My manager threw the keys up on the roof! Laughed ! and said, this should help close the deal! They actually bought the new car and replaced their "lost" keys.WTF!

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Number: 72 Submitted on: 2009-12-14

I have a boss that had 'Tasty Cakes" sent down to florida while he was TDY there so he could impress a 'lady friend'. He sent these from Delaware through military transportation, had the base pay for it. Never did see much of him while he was down there ....

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Number: 71 Submitted on: 2009-12-13

I can relate to 55. My boss shows up to work maybe 30% of the time and thats only to get work out and make his boss happy. Whenever he is told of something unethical going on in the group he pushes it on another department or simply state, "That employee gets out the numbers". This is the US govmnt!

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Number: 70 Submitted on: 2009-12-13

My EX-boss was a total bi$%#. She had me demote someone so her girlfriend could have that job. She also has one of the nastiest mouths - swearing at employees yet thinking we all loved her.

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Number: 67 Submitted on: 2009-12-13

With only 2 weeks before EOY, my boss: comes in 2 hours late, another 2 hours online Xmas shopping, an hour juggling 2 lady friends on the phone, lunch for an hour, then uses the rest of the day to do "personal stuff" (*his* words). All this after a 3 week vacation and plans to take off for Xmas.

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